Flow Notes
The Art of Start
You will start creating wonders when you stop looking for more information and start acting on the information you already have.
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Be around people who you love
I left a high-paying corporate job so that I can be closer to people I love. I let go of opportunity to relocate to a different country because I wanted to be close to my family.
It is important because success only matters when you can share it with those you love. That’s the whole point of being successful.
If you are successful but far away (and invisible) to those who truly love you – are you really successful?
Proximity to people you love (and people who love you) is worth way more than any job will ever pay you.
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Reliability
Brilliance is important, but without reliability, your brilliance is fleeting.
People you serve (your family, your customers, your colleagues, friends etc) value your reliability far more than your brilliance.
Be reliable. Be consistent. Be integral. Do what you say you will do. Say only what you know you will be able to do.
Your life will change when you realize that being reliable > being brilliant alone.
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Don’t Reveal the Next Scene
This quote resonated with me (and aligns with the previous post on oversharing)
“Your life is a movie. Don’t tell everyone your next scene – it will be boring and expected, otherwise.”
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Oversharing
Oversharing anything is the leakage of your energy. Telling people more than what they need to know is how people take you for granted.
Be an enigma. Let people wonder. Don’t seek attention. Be silent. That way, you’ll live peacefully. Peaceful people vibrate at a higher energy.
I once heard someone say, “Only speak when it’s time to say checkmate.”
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Knowing when to Ignore
I love this quote:
“If you have a problem with me, call me. If you don’t have my number, you don’t know me well enough to have a problem with me.” – Christian Bale
This is so true. We often end up responding to problems people may have with us (e.g. trolls) when the best thing we can do is ignore them.
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Be Gentle with People Who Love You
Be gentle with people who love you. Because we often take them for granted the most.
Treat them gently. Tell them how much you love them. Thank them. Give them a surprise. Just notice small acts of love.
Gratitude in relationships brings appreciation for the goodness you are surrounded with.
Being good to people who are good to you is the least you can do for them.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson on Success
This has to be one of the best definitions of success I have come across.
“To laugh often and much: To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you lived. This is to have succeeded.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Carving your own path
There is no fun in life and work if a clear future is charted for you with certainty. The joy is in finding your own unique path.
Joseph Campbell rightly said, “If the path before you is clear, you’re probably on someone else’s.”
But how do you carve your own path? By trying out stuff. By taking diversions. Investing in areas where your skills overlap. Making mistakes. Failing fast and often. Adapting and learning from it. It’s only when you try many things that you find a few that are worthwhile.
Tom Peters, who I had the privilege of speaking with once, said: Whoever tries the most stuff wins.
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The Right Company
“I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.” – Robin Williams
Be careful about who you choose to spend your time with!
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What Actions Say!
The other day, we met someone and the conversation started around diet and nutrition.
He shared with us that since he is a diabetic, he has stopped eating Wheat and Rice completely. We took a casual note of this without paying much attention.
The next day, he shared an Instagram reel of eating a loaded burger. A few days later, he was seen relishing some other unhealthy stuff.
That is how people are. Their actions are far away from the ideals they describe in their words.
Therefore, when you want to judge people, pay little attention to what they “say” and more attention to what they “do”.
For actions, they speak way louder than words.
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Don’t Waste Your Words
Don’t waste your words explaining things to someone who is:
a) Not capable of understanding
b) Not willing to understand
That is a waste of your energy. If someone is not capable of understanding your point of view, you can still explain, teach, clarify and educate.
But if someone is not willing to understand, that is a problem of intention.
Save yourself by not explaining.
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“Have to” to “Get to”
“I have to study” seems like a complain. It speaks of a compulsion.
“I get to study” seems like gratitude. That you get to study in a world where so many kids don’t have the privilege of going to a school.
Replace “I have to…” with “I get to…” and your mindset about your work, family, health, relationships, money, experiences etc. will change.
When you change your language, it shifts your perspective for better.
With change in perspective, we think, do and feel different.
It’s magical.
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Listening with an Open Mind
Here’s a profound quote that highlights the importance of listening with an open mind.
“To listen is to lean in, softly, with a willingness to be changed by what we hear.” – Mark Nepo
Like a windshield, our preconceived notions, beliefs and judgments can block the essence of what other person is trying to say.
When we listen with a closed mind, we absorb only what we think we should know
When we listen with an open mind, we absorb the essence of what other person is saying.
Next time you are in a conversation, listen intentionally. Listening is an art that builds our connection with others.
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The Angry Boat
This is a timeless wisdom on how to handle situations involving anger in relationships.
A rule that I have personally followed for so many year (and it has helped me immensely at work and in life) is this: “There can be only one person in the angry boat.”
Anger as a response to anger escalates conflict. Calm in the face of anger is a step forward in resolving it.
Mahatma Gandhi got it right: “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.”
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You are what you read and who you meet
I can tell this from my experience:
What you become eventually is a result books you read, stories you consume and people you meet.
That’s because all of the above helps you broaden your awareness.
Awareness helps us choose better.
Choices we make, end up making us.
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Deciding and Doing
There is a HUGE difference between deciding to do something and actually doing it.
Consider this riddle:
5 frogs are sitting on a log of wood. 3 decide to jump. How many frogs remain?
Answer? 5, because 3 have only decided to jump. They have not actually jumped yet.
A decision is only as valuable as your ability to act on it.
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Scarcity..
creates demand.
Do things that are scarce and you’ll never be out of job. Build a set of unique skills that are inherent to you. Blend them together to create something that only YOU can do.
If you want to be valued, be scarce.
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Trying to Catch Two Monkeys
If you try to catch two monkeys at the same time, you’ll miss both.
If you are thinking about meeting a friend while studying, you are neither meeting the friend, nor studying. You are missing out on both.
Do one thing at a time, and do it well. Multi-tasking is a myth.
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The Value of Following Up
To get anything done, you have to follow-up with yourself or other people who are getting it done.
Knowing what needs to be done (e.g. task lists) is a good start. But following up is the key to execution. It is the key to getting any job done.
Create tasks but revisit them end of each day. What is completed? What is pending? What will you do tomorrow to complete? Who can help you do it? What dependencies do you have?
This simple system of revisiting and following up with your own tasks persistently is a great way to keep yourself (and others) accountable.
That’s how we make progress. That’s how things get done.
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